The Pains of a Long Distance MarriageHubz applied for a tourist visa yesterday, hoping he'd be able to come to the US before I give birth. His petition is underway and we have been receiving a lot of correspondences from NVC (National Visa Center). We thought that that is proof enough that he will definitely come back to wait for the final leg. Wrong! The consul told him that their policy is to deny tourist visa applications when there is a pending petition. They don't even care what the purpose of his visit was. It's a red flag among them to deny applications when immigrant petitions are pending. Hubz told me that a lot of tourist visas were granted yesterday. Unfortunately, he wasn't one of those lucky ones. The consul even checked the status of his petition and advised him to just wait. He wasn't even asked for any other proof that he'd definitely come back.
My heart just went out to him because I know he feels bad about it. Imagine not being there when your child is born! I tried to put a brave face amidst it all because I didn't want him to worry about me and the baby. After we talked, I just cried. I even fell asleep crying!
How can they be so heartless? It doesn't matter to them that I don't have a family nearby to help me out when I give birth. True, I could always come home but hubz and I decided it wouldn't be a good idea. The main reason why we're struggling amidst the pains of temporary separation is so we can give our children a good future. Argh, all the things you sacrifice for your child!
I was out to dinner with my roommate and another friend (celebrating her birthday) when I received the news. My friends noticed the change in my expression. Immediately this other friend offered to be there when I give birth. She asked my roommate to call her as soon as my contractions start and she'll assist me (with my roommate) at the hospital. I also have a few more friends who expressed their intentions to help - whether it be at the hospital or my first few weeks at home. I consider myself blessed to have friends like them.
These past few weeks, I have also been busy attending childbirth classes. I feel bad because I seem to be one of those without their husbands in attendance. In a way, I resented our being apart, especially at this time. But, when I got the news regarding his tourist visa application being denied, I knew I don't have the right to feel bad. At least I'll be with our baby while he can't even hug or kiss him for a while. What could be more painful than that, right? I have a baby to hold while he'd only have pictures to keep him company. He's even worried that when they finally meet, our baby won't even recognize him.
Still, even through all these, I know we still have a lot more to be thankful for. I just pray that this LD business will soon come to an end because it's taxing enough for me and my husband - and our baby will soon be added to that equation!